Drought

I cannot decide if I want to hold on for dear life
Or for you to walk away
To vanish visibly as you have gradually for the last years
These small rips will not reknit or be mended by hope
I have learned too many times that it does no good
Perhaps this is simple
I should wish you to go
I cannot stop you from leaving eventually
Even if I am the one who is gone
Emotionally you are vacant
An empty house abandoned in the midst of a storm
Will not wait for finer weather
For the clouds to pass and the rain to dry
Even if the thunder has lessened from a deafening screech
To the shallow beat of loneliness
Which lacks the ability to strike lightening
Lacks the ability to harm
But does not lack the desire
Is not hallowed of its bitter virtues
Nor is it stripped of the potential
If you had stayed planted in this dysfunction would you survive
Or would I die either way
Thirsting for that which you will not provide